August 3, 2024

Whats an ally?

There are people who don’t identify as LGBTQ+ but who are strong supporters. They stand up for the equal rights of the LGBTQ+ community. They are called allies.

Listed below are some ways that you can be a supportive ally

1. Be a listener.
2. Be open-minded.
3. Be inclusive and invite LGBTQ+ friends to hang out with your friends and family.
4. Don’t assume that all your friends and co-workers are heterosexual. Someone close to you could be looking for support in their coming-out process.
5. Confront your own prejudices and bias, even if it is uncomfortable to do so.
6. Defend your LGBTQ+ friends against discrimination.
7. Treat all people, regardless of gender identity and sexual orientation, with dignity and respect.

by LGBTQ* Care at Stony Brook Medicine

1. Be patient with yourself. It’s not necessary to tell everyone at once. Take your time.
2. Only come out if you feel safe; if it is the right time with the right person.
3. Don’t push yourself.
4. Start small. It can be easier to start by telling friends than by telling family. Find allies in your family. If you think a brother or sister or cousin will be easier to tell, start there.
5. Develop a support network of friends who are accepting and supportive.
6. Plan ahead. Think about where you want to come out and how you want to say it.
7. Be positive. When you come out to someone, you set the tone.
8. Find resources or get a mentor to talk to.
9. Don’t come out in anger or retaliation.
10. Be patient with others. Some people take longer to digest the information than others.
11. Realize that they may need some time to adjust.
12. Be firm. Identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender (LGBT) or whatever word you use, if you’re sure.
13. Ask LGBT friends to share their coming out stories.
14. Refer parents and friends to PFLAG or other resources that might help.
15. Be prepared for different types of reactions.